Mum fumes another mum ‘invites herself’ and her kid to daughter’s birthday party
Planning a child’s birthday party can be a nightmare, especially if your kid is a social butterfly and wants to invite their entire class, which can quickly get expensive.
But one mum on Mumsnet has found herself in a tricky situation after planning a “fairly pricey” event for her daughter’s upcoming eighth birthday with only five of her classmates invited, as she accidentally spilt the beans to another mum whose child isn’t on the guestlist.
And instead of leaving the conversation alone, the other mum took it upon herself to say that her daughter would be attending the party anyway – even though the two girls have “literally never played together”.
The mum explained the conversation started when the other parent asked if her daughter was attending a different event that coincided with the party, and when she found out what was happening, she said her own daughter would “much rather” go to the party than the other event.
In her post, she wrote: “My daughter is turning 8 in August and we’ve organised a small party for her, telling her she can have six guests from school. It’s an activity so fairly pricey per child, hence the numbers.
“One of the school mums asked me if my daughter was attending an event that coincides with the date of the party and I foolishly said, ‘no because it’s her birthday and she’s having a party’.
“The mum instantly said, oh ok I’ll say no to the event then as [her daughter] would much rather go to your party. The kids have literally never played together.”
To make matters worse, the mum didn’t clarify that the other child wasn’t invited and simply walked away from the situation – and is now “stressed out” about whether to let the child attend the event or not.
She added: “Instead of replying, ‘sorry she’s not invited’, I sort of sheepishly murmured something about having to go and headed off.
“I’m now stressed out about this, should I just let the kid come? Or was the Mum being cheeky to just assume her kid was invited?
“There are lots of smaller parties in the class, so nothing new there. For what it’s worth she seems like a nice person, although I don’t know her particularly well and my daughter has never had any negative experiences with the other kid. But still, there are other kids she’d rather invite if there was the option of an extra space and I feel like I’ve been backed into a corner.
“I’m annoyed with myself but also finding the whole thing a bit stressful and awkward.”
Commenters on the Mumsnet post were quick to offer advice to the mum, with many telling her to just message the other woman to let her know that numbers are limited so her daughter can’t attend the party.
One person said: “Just send her a message saying [something like] ‘sorry if we’ve got our wires crossed. My daughter is having a very small party with just 5-6 close friends so feel free to do the other social thing instead.’ “
While another added: “Just be direct and tell her your daughter is only having a small group for her party.”
And a third wrote: “You need to fix this. Your daughter has picked her closest friends. You can’t invite this other girl – your daughter will be so disappointed.”